Both spouses have been granted their rights by Islam. Although both sets of dues are sacred and safeguarded by the Almighty by His demand of respect for them, the rights of the husband have been enshrouded with greater weight and status. This is made clear by the hadith:
“If I were to command anyone to prostrate to anyone other than Allah, I would have commanded women to prostrate to their husbands.” (Ibn Mājah)
In the Sunnah, a woman’s commitment to please Allah is tied to her commitment to please her husband. Furthermore, a woman’s chances of securing Jannah and avoiding Jahannam are directly linked to her attitude towards her husband. Therefore, every woman who is determined to avoid Hellfire, please Allah, and attain Jannah should also be determined to learn about the rights of the husband.
“No woman can fulfil her duty towards Allah until she fulfils her duty towards her husband.” (Ibn Mājah)
Read on as we highlight the basic entitlements given to him as decreed by Allah.
The Right To Obedience
Allah has made the man a qawwām (protector and maintainer) of the woman. One can really learn to understand the beauty of this ruling by looking into the linguistic meaning of qawwām. Many mistakenly allude qawwām to mean an unquestionable boss with complete authority over the wife no matter what the circumstance. Although the husband is due obedience, tyranny is not at all what qawwām is referring to. It comes from the term qiyām: to stand. Thus, the husband is also a strong support for his wife — her rock, helping her ‘stand.’
Thus, the husband has the right to command, direct, and lead the nurturing of his wife. In essence, he has been granted the status of her guardian and protector due to the superiority in mental and physical proficiency given to him by Allah:
“Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allah has made one of them to excel the other, and because they spend (to support them) from their means.” (Quran 4:34)
Making Herself Available To Him
Once the nikkah is complete and the mahr is given, the wife becomes obliged to make herself physically available to her husband. This is one of his greatest rights, and if a wife refuses, she has committed a major sin — unless she has a valid shar‘i excuse such as menses, obligatory fasting, sickness, etc.
“When a man calls his wife to his bed and she refuses, and he went to sleep angry with her, the angels will curse her until morning.” (Bukhari)
To Be Treated With Kindness
Conflicts in marriages must be kept to a minimum; this allows for harmony to flourish and blossom. One way to ensure this is by living with each other in kindness. Just as the wife is due grace from her husband, he too is owed similar from her.
“And they (women) have rights (over their husbands as regards living expenses) similar (to those of their husbands) over them (as regards obedience and respect) to what is reasonable.” (Quran 2:228)
Not Allowing Who He Dislikes Into His House
One of the rights of the husband is that his wife should not admit anyone whom he dislikes into his home.
The family home in Islam is to be treated with honour and respect. Thus, both man and woman have a duty to safeguard the marital household. However, the responsibility to protect the home is heavier upon the wife, as evidenced by the hadith:
“Your rights over your women are that they should not let anyone whom you dislike sit on your bed, and they should not let anyone whom you dislike enter your house.” (al-Tirmidhi)