When asked to describe the characteristics of a bad husband or wife, many can provide a general picture, but few can give a clear list of specific traits.
That’s where this blog comes in, to highlight to you, in a succinct and digestible manner, the particular qualities that all sisters and brothers should avoid having so they can ensure that they don’t fall into the category of being ‘the worst person to marry’.
The Volcano
No one likes being around someone with a temper. You don’t feel safe or comfortable if you know they're going to tick off any minute over the most trivial of things. You’re on edge every moment you’re with them, dreading the inevitable onset of one of their ‘episodes’. Be it a family member, friend, boss, etc., it’s a nightmare. Now imagine being married to someone like this….
Spouses are supposed to be each other’s bedrock of support, source of peace and tranquility, a best friend, your very own cheerleader, and team player. However, a spouse with an explosive temper will be the direct opposite of this, and thus someone with volcanic anger must be avoided for marriage.
The Talker
This describes the person who is keen to share their marital matters with all of those in their circle.Be it the highs or lows of the marriage, The Talker is up to share it all. This qualifies them to be amongst the worst people to marry as over-sharing marital blessings risks your marriage becoming victim to the evil eye.
Matters become even more complicated if he/she is publishing the conflicts that happen behind closed doors as this opens the floodgates to unjustified presumptions, harmful advice, meddling and the list goes on.
Lazy Lounger
Marriage is hard work and I’m sure we’ve all heard it before. Especially when, Islamically, the husband has the responsibility of leading the household, while the wife has the duty of raising the children. Both of these weighty tasks require knowledge, i.e. comprehension of the Quran, sunnah, Arabic language, etc. Both motivation and consistency are fundamental in the pursuit of Islamic knowledge; however, both of these qualities are bound to be lacking in a lazy spouse who is content with their weak grasp on ‘ilm.
This will result in a mother who barely knows how to read basic Arabic, teaching your children Quran, and a husband who can barely enjoin the good and forbid the evil as his grasp on what ‘evil’ and ‘good’ mean in Islam is so weak.
The Innovator
The dangers of allowing bid’ah (innovation) into your home cannot be overstated. The risks are exacerbated when there are kids involved, as they’re bound to grow up confused about right and wrong in Islam, not to mention them becoming dangerously accepting of commonplace bid’ah such as amulets, mawlid, etc.